by Mat Churchill

Humans are a strange breed. You're more likely to get an angry reaction from a fellow human, not because of Government inaction on global poverty, but because you forgot to indicate at a roundabout.

Why are we wired to be so petty? Have we got it so good that we've lost all sense of the harsh reality displayed nightly on our 130cm plasma tellies?

Here are just a few of the big issues that take the jam out of my donut.

1. Not enough jam in my donut

2. People who walk too slowly in the middle of a footpath, oblivious to the fact that there may be other people in town who walk faster than slow-moving lava, or that there are other people in town fullstop.

3. Opening a packet of Grain Wave chips and realising you've nearly finished before you even start (I swear there were no more than four in that packet).

4. Just when you thought economy class leg room couldn't get any less, along comes the Tiger - Cairns to Melbourne 1.15am flight. I felt like a battery hen in a game of tetris we were wedged in so tightly.

5. Anyone who says "gotten".

6. Glee. I'd rather shove mud crabs up my bum with a burnt stick than watch that show. Even the ads are enough to send me reaching for the sick bag I stole off a Tiger flight to Melbourne.

7. 'Unchained Melody' by The Righteous Brothers. Worst song ever (with 'Walking on Sunshine' a close second).

8. Side drivers. People who drive on the very edge of a suitably wide road causing me great confusion and torment as to whether they want me to pass or not.

9. Trying to get Ice Magic onto my ice cream when I haven't run it under a hot tap first, making it come out like a shoe lace rather than the picture on the bottle.

10. The movie 'The Sweetest Thing." How can a movie be so awful that it makes a heterosexual male see Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate wearing very little want to scratch his eyes out?

And my all time biggest gripe…

Going to a flash restaurant and having to order side dishes that have no excuse not to be on the plate in the first place. Why should I pay $35 for a steak and have to buy chips and veggies (the natural allies of the steak) for another $9 each?

I've waited a long time to have the medium to be able to hold up a mirror to society and say "I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not gonna take it anymore."

Now it's your turn. What are the little things that make you see red? Let us know below.